Kranker Webtip : Darwin Awards

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The Darwin Awards honor those who improve our gene pool by removing themselves from it.

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(July 2002, Wisconsin) Two drunks were goofing around, when one challenged the other to shoot him with cigarette butts "to see what it would feel like." His friend obligingly loaded a gun with three cigarette butts, placing ammunition behind the butts to make sure they left the barrel of the gun. He then shot his friend from a distance of seven feet. The friend who issued the challenge died of two cigarette butts to the head, and one to the heart.

Zitat von .dcp

Gerbil Rocket
1998 Urban Legend

(1997 - 1998) "In retrospect, lighting the match was my big mistake. But I was only trying to save the gerbil," Eric Tomaszewski told the bemused doctors in the Severe Burns Unit of Salt Lake City Hospital. Tomaszewski and his homosexual partner, Andrew "Kiki" Farnum, had been admitted for emergency treatment after a felching session had gone seriously wrong.
"I pushed a cardboard toilet paper tube up his rectum and slipped Ragout, our gerbil, in," he explained. "As usual, Kiki shouted out 'Armageddon,' my cue that he'd had reached nirvana, so to speak. I tried to retrieve Raggot but he simply would not come out, so I peered into the tube and struck a match, thinking the light might attract him."
At a hushed press conference, a hospital spokesman desribed what happened next.

"The match ignited a pocket of intestinal methane gas in Kiki's colon. Flames shot out the tube, ignited Mr. Tomaszewski's hair and severely burning his face. It also set fire to the gerbil's fur and whiskers, causing it to scurry further up Kiki's colon, which in turn ignited a larger pocket of gas further up the intestine, propelling the rodent out of the cardboard tube like a cannonball."

Tomaszewski suffered second degree burns and a broken nose from the impact of the gerbil, while Farnum suffered first and second degree burns to his anus and lower intestinal tract.

Sadly, Ragout the gerbil did not survive the incident.


muhahahahahah, rofl³, :auszuck: *nachluftring* *aufbodenkringel*

ich kann nicht mehr...

Zitat

Der Bruder des Toten erwägt jetzt eine Klage gegen die Wirtin. Der Helm, der aus dem Lokal war, wird auf allfällige Vorschäden untersucht. "Ich will, dass die Lokalbetreiberin ihre Konzession verliert, damit dort nie mehr etwas ähnliches gespielt werden kann", hofft Josef Renzl.